A Sad Day

Yesterday was an emotional day for me. A friend that I met online on a cystic fibrosis forum passed away last week. We met nearly 3 years ago and it has been interesting to know her and share in her experiences. She was LDS as well which makes it easier to talk with people. I was able to attend her graveside. They didnt have a funeral persay, but this was a very beautiful experience. There was a viewing Mon. night that I was not able to attend. Let me just start back on Monday of last week. I emailed Roshelle to see how things were going. I hadnt heard from her in a while and had been crazy busy. I felt terrible for not emailing sooner. I then recieved an email on Tuesday night from her basically telling me goodbye. I literally felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I knew that things were terrible and I honestly thought she was going to die nearly two months ago, but Roshelle has always been a fighter and I guess it kind of took me off guard. I thought she would show them one last time. But I was happy for her release to know that she would suffer no longer. I wasn't sure when she passed until I called her husband on Thursday and he shared those special moments with me. She truly fought to the end. She was such an amazing person. I then left for vacation after talking to her husband, with Roshelle constantly on my mind. When I returned home I had a message from her husband asking if I would say the closing pray at the graveside. I was truly humbled that they would include me in this special day. I called J and told him I would be honored. I got to the graveside that morning and saw J, we hugged and I had no words. What do you say to someone that just lost their love? I went and got a seat and looked at her program. On it was the beautiful picture that was posted in the obituary along with this scripture, that is actually my motto for life. Proverbs 3:5-6: 5 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. I knew that we had special bond, and it became that much stronger. My eyes began to well up and then I looked at the back of the program. I found this scripture that I sent to Ro in an email probably 6 weeks ago. I found it very fitting. I had no idea that they were putting it on her program and the tears began to spill over. Enos 1:27: 27 And I soon go to the place of my rest, which is with my Redeemer; for I know that in him I shall rest. And I rejoice in the day when my mortal shall put on immortality, and shall stand before him; then shall I see his face with pleasure, and he will say unto me: Come unto me, ye blessed, there is a place prepared for you in the mansions of my Father. Amen. I know without a doubt that Ro is breathing easy and she is free from the pains of this world and a body that would know longer support her giant spirit. Her husband did a beautiful job at speaking and I know that they can be together again for eternity. It truly was a beautiful day. I have felt many things with Ros passing, guilt being a big one, gulity because I am living and actually healthier than I have been in a long time and I have had to watch her struggle and decrease in health. I have now changed that guilt into overwhelming gratitude that I am able to be here with my husband and daughter and pray that I don't take one moment for granite. I pray that we can all hug our loved ones a little tighter tonight and let them know just how much we love them. I let Ros parents know that she touched many lives more than I think any of us know. Her blog was roroisland2.blogspot.com for anyone that would like to read it.

Memories

Here is a fun little game...Leave a comment on my blog of a memory that you and I have had together. It doesn't matter if you've known me for a short time, or a long time, anything you remember! Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you.On your mark...get set...blog your memories!!

All things rolled into one!

So no, I havent been a very good poster. I figure once every two weeks will show everything of excitement that we do. We can be very boring:) So what we have been up to?
Father's Day...
breakfast in bed. What more could be wanted. I also got Ben a firepit. I need to take a picture. We have spent many nights out roasting and it has been awesome.


Girls Camp...
Every year I honestly dread girls camp. I have to wear oxygen continually when I am in the mountains and it is a pain to say the least, but I got over myself and decided that I would stay most of the time this year. I slept over for two nights and had a great time with my girls. They are all awesome and unique. They are always teaching me new things and helping me be a better person. I love you girls!


our bishop(my brother) is crazy and becomes like the girls when he is there.


Me and my girls, these girls are seriously the most amazing girls I have ever been around.


My 2nd counselor DeAnn, and my Secretary Janet. I couldnt do it without them and they are great friends.

4-wheeleer ride...
This past Saturday we went on a picnic on our 4 wheeler. It was awesome. Cambree loves it. Her and her dad make me a little nervous. I am not sure that I can send the two of them off without me. We had a really good time and it helps with my buyers remorse from the purchase of the 4-wheeler. It really is something fun we can do as a family.

Our House

There are a few that have not yet seen our house that have wanted me to take pics (namely Lyndsay) so this is for you! I don't have our bedrooms, bathroom, computer room, or any of upstairs which consists of Cambrees bedroom and playroom. Maybe later. Anyway, we love our home and Ben did a great job figuring it all out. I did pick the paint colors but mostly Ben picked everything else.


Our Living Room

Another angle of Living Room

Our Dining Room, attached to kitchen

Our Kitchen

Sitting Room

Area leading upstairs

Tags

Here are some answers to some tagging that has been done. ABC's "getting to know you" TAG. Complete the ABC's of you. Then, each player tags 3 people and posts their names, goes to their blogs and leaves a comment letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog. Thanks Leesa, here we go: A- Attached or single: Happily attached. B- Best Friend: Ben, Cambree, I actually feel like I have a lot of best friends if that is possible .C-Cake or Pie: Devils food cake D-Day:Saturday, I love just hanging out as a family on Saturday E- Essential Item: Nebulizer, I have to be able to do my treatments wherever I am F- Favorite Color: It has been purple for forever but I am really digging Orange these days G-Gummy Bears or Worms: Gummy bears H-Home town: Fairview, oh how I havent gone very far I- Indulgences: eating out J- January or July?: July - I hate being cold!!!! K-Kids:One little girl and a little boy at heart. L-Life is incomplete without: My family M- Marriage Date: June 07, 2002. N-Number of Siblings: oh boy, 6 sisters 4 brothers, yours, mine and ours O- Oranges or Apples: Both! But they have to be granny smith apples. P- Phobias or Fears: I have a severe fear of snakes I guess then it would be a phobia. Also very claustrophobic Q- Quote: Miracles Happen, the most astonishing thing about miracles is that they happen R- Reason To Smile: I am happy and healthy and have a beautiful family S- Season: Fall, I love the feel in the air T- Tag Three: Erin, Jennie, Michelle U- Unknown fact about me: V- Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animal: 100% Oppressor of Animals W- Worst Habit: picking scabs, it just sounds so gross when you read it. X-Rays or Ultrasounds: I love ultrasounds if it means there is a baby to be seen, but it seems I am more of an X-ray girl since I get them so often Y-Your favorite food: this is tough, I love food in general. I love olive garden toasted ravioli Z- Zodiac Sign: Capricorn, The Capricorn person is: prudent, responsible, very wise, formal, patient, methodical, disciplined, traditional, cautious, conventional, hard-working, polite, persevering, ambitious, dedicated, focused, honest, dependable, serious, self-reliant, businesslike, career-oriented, authoritative, conscientious, and competent. comforting • strong • steady • steadfast [5] • organized • cautious • trustworthy [5] • calm • tenacious [6] • stable • patient • faithful [5] I think a few of these are very much like me. On to the next tag, 6 random things about me. If you look further back in my post you will find 28 random things about me. 1. I hate exercise but I do exercise 4-5 times a week. 2. If I don't know you I most likely wont go out of my way to get to know you, depends on my mood. 3. I think that I am much funnier than other people think that I am. Well, at least than Ben thinks I am 4. I once drove in a convertible with the top down in the middle of January with a bunch of blankets and the heat cranked. I later got sick. 5. I often lie to people when asked how I am doing. It is just easier that way and I also want to be known as the "strong" person 6. Young womens president is one of the hardest most rewarding callings I have ever had. I am way too hard on myself and never feel like I am doing a good job.

Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Anniversary

So if any of you know the tune to that little jingle you probably won't get it out of your head for a bit. Anyway, it is our 6 year anniversary on Saturday. It is crazy to think of all that has gone on these past 6 years. Our lives have been crazy, but blessed beyond belief. If anyone would have told me we would be living in Fairview and Ben would be working at the telephone company I would have laughed in their face. Little did we know what the Lord had in store and oh how I am grateful that He knows so much more than we do.

A little sappy message to Ben, thank you for being my best friend and for giving up your dreams to make our dreams a reality. You are amazing and I could have never asked for a better husband, father to Cambree, or son in law to my parents. You are the best and I love you more now than I could have ever dreamed. I am so grateful that we are an eternal family and that through it all we can always hold close to that knowledge. We are truly so blessed! Heres to many more.


Our engagement picture

My bridal

The big day

Our amazing honeymoon in Disneyland!

Emotions

This last week has been filled with emotions! First of all my best friend Karole moved to Arizona. I knew it would be hard but I really didnt know it would be this hard. I miss her and her family so much. They moved next door to us nearly 2 years ago and our friendship has gone beyond that. They are family. We are all going to miss them so much. Cambree was pretending today that Braxton and Issac were here playing with her. It nearly broke my heart. She is going to miss her two buddies/brothers. I can't tell you how many times I have just broke down crying because of it. I couldnt even talk about it after I told them goodbye. It is really going to be difficult for us. Now on to the good times, well we went and spent Saturday night with our good friends Jake and Erin. Jake is seriously the funniest kid you will ever meet. We always have a stomachache after hanging out with both Ben and Jake together. Rolling on the floor laughing is usually what happens. Then on Sunday we went and had dinner with Bens uncle Mark that we just met at his dad's funeral. That was really interesting. I am so glad that we got to go. They seriously are some of the nicest people I know and it was all so comfortable which really amazed me. Its funny that every time we have ever been with anyone from that side of the family it has never been awkward. I think that Ben enjoyed it. I am always the one to ask the most questions but wasnt sure if it was my place here or not so next time I am totally going to get the scoop on everything. There is still so much in the air that I think we should find out. I am way too curious. Then we got home and just hung out on Monday and then on Tuesday I got a call from my mom that my uncle was dying. It is my dad (Jims) sister's husband and we found out in December that he had cancer in his stomach. He did chemo for a bit but it didnt seem to be helping so he decided to stop. They were able to take a wonderful trip to Hawaii with all of his kids and had the best time of their lives. After they got home is when he really started to go down hill. We went and saw him about a month ago and I was shocked at how much weight he had lost. I was pretty sure it wouldnt be too much longer. I feel so sad for my aunt and her loss. They have only been married for 7 years and I know it is truly the happiest she has ever been. He was an amazing man and he will be missed. It all just gives me a greater perspective of how fragile life is. We have had a death every 2 years since Ben and I have been married and all around this time of year. It is a little eerie. I have so many emotions right now. Feeling a complete hole knowing I can't just run over to Karoles or have her boys come and play with Cambree, sheer excitement for getting to know Bens Kizerian family better, and pure sadness for my aunt and the loss we have had in our family. Life is really a roller coaster sometimes.