5 year plan

I am sure we have all heard it, where do you plan to be in 5 years. Of course we always expect the best for ourselves and never include any type of heartache or difficulty along the way. It all looks so clear as we trudge ahead. Little do we know what lies in wait for us. It was 5 years ago to the very day actually that I found myself in an empty living room with boxes all around crying. I knew this was it, I was going home, something I neither planned nor wanted. I was devastated. I had quit a job I loved, said good bye to dear friends and watched as the first 1 1/2 year of our marriage got put into a trailor. We were going to live with my mom and dad, (kathy and jim, something I swore I would never do while married) back in Fairview a place I thought was nice to visit (but promised myself I would never live there again). Little did I know the plans that our Heavenly Father had in store for us. I was expecting Cambree and had gone in the hospital right before thanksgiving that year. I had already been in the hospital 3 times that year and Ben had made me promise after the 2nd time if I went in again I would quit my job. Well pride got the better of me and it wasnt until I was pregnant that I realized this job was literally killing me and a baby would not survive under these conditions with my body and the stress of it all. I knew the minute I went in the hospital that I was going to have to quit, but it wasnt until 3 people said I should move home that it actually entered my mind. It took me 2 weeks to finally say it out loud and admit that somethings got to give. I called my boss and told her sobbing hysterically. Ben and I had prayed and fasted and new this was best. Come Dec. 12, 2003 our lives were changing drastically. We had no jobs, no income and no home with a baby on the way. All things pointed to... this will never work, what are you thinking? We new in our hearts that this is what the Lord wanted for us. We put our faith in him and with a leap of faith we left Provo with not much to show for ourselves. For 2 weeks Ben searched for a job, to no avail. My insurance had a year left and we were needing a job that would have good benefits. Then it happened. My dad (Eddie) told Ben on Christmas day that there was a position opening up at the telephone company. He went to the interview and was hired. Miracles were beginning to happen. You had to work for the company for 3 months for insurance to kick in. On April 1, 2004 our insurance started. Cambree was born 26 days later and came with a hospital bill of 150,000. We paid absolutely nothing and due to Afflac actually began a nice little savings account. It was while I was in the hospital that I also found out that I qualified for disability which would give us money each month. The gratitude we felt at that time for what the Lord had done for us and continues to do is something that cannot be put into words. Under all accounts I probably should not have made it through having Cambree, but thankfully the Lord had a plan for me that included being here to raise my child. I was told when she was a few months old that I had a 50% chance that I would live 5 years. Wow, what kind of a five year plan is that? But again the lord has placed wonderful things ahead of me that have led me to where I am and the health that I am in. I could not ask for more. I am so grateful for how well our beautiful daughter did in the hospital I never thought I would get off oxygen, but it came with yet again a miraculous story behind it. Having a beautiful home at our age was nothing I ever even considered. We are blessed beyond belief. It took me nearly 2 years to finally be okay with living in Fairview and now you couldnt pay me to leave.

Dealing with my husbands broken leg is nothing I ever want to do again, he is still dealing with the repurcussions. But this is something that led him to the position he has at work which has led us to very good opportunities. He is happy at work and that is something that everyone wants and I am especially grateful for. I always feared that I had ruined Bens dreams by us having to move here, but yet again the Lord knows best.

We would have never met these fabulous people had we not gone through what we have gone through. I know that the Lord led us to them and although it came through some terrible measures we are so grateful to have them in our lives. This is Ben's dads brother and his family. They are absolutley amazing and it feels like we have always known them.

So all in all we never really know where we will be in 5 years, but as I look back I can see the Lords hand in every step of the way. I am so grateful for His plan for me and thankful that he deems me worthy enough to receive the spirit to lead the way. I would have never chosen this path,the path I had in store would not have led to all the wonderful blessings we have. That I am sure of. I am so thankful that we listened and only pray that I can continue to be led by a loving Heavenly Father that sees the whole picture.